


Of Missing Pieces and Solemn Vows

by NicePumpkinSpice



Series: Of Sweet Memories and Guarded Moments [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2018-03-13 07:11:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3372479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NicePumpkinSpice/pseuds/NicePumpkinSpice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Evelyn isn't having much luck finding love.  Perhaps her choice in men is to blame.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Missing Pieces and Solemn Vows

Evelyn felt her jaw drop just a bit. She knew that she needed to formulate some sort of response, but she was too taken aback. Krem had just revealed that he was passing as a man. _Well, shit._ she thought. Three men had caught her eye since she had joined the Inquisition - Dorian, Cullen, and Krem. While Dorian was now one of her closest friends, Evelyn knew after their trip to confront his father that she had no hope of anything more with him. Cullen was infuriatingly oblivious to her advances, a complete workaholic, and a _Templar_ for good measure. And now Krem was ... _I sure can pick them._ Evelyn thought sullenly.

Falling back on her most used defense, Evelyn decided to change the subject. “So, Dalish, why aren’t you with your clan?” she queried. Awkward moment sidestepped, she spent the rest of the night drinking and singing with the Chargers. She was glad that she had pushed aside her reservations about Bull’s Qunari ties to accept their help. They were brutally efficient shock troops and marvelous drinking buddies.

After a few hours of mead infused fun with Bull’s men, Evelyn was the drunkest she had been since she found the First Enchanter’s private stash as a 13 year old. She decided that it would be an excellent idea to consult Bull for relationship advice.

“So Bull, you are a spy and all...” she slurred. “Have you noticed my magnificently horrendous taste in men?” Not waiting for a reply Evelyn continued, “I mean I had the biggest crush on Dorian and that is going _nowhere_.” She glanced over to Bull’s good eye and saw that he must have already known as much. “And then Krem... Well, Krem, is pretty much perfect - handsome, strong, intelligent. But he’s lacking an important part ...” Evelyn’s face flushed. _Did I say that out loud?_ she thought and pushed the tankard in front of her far away. Bull let out a guttural laugh and clapped Evelyn on the back.

“And then there’s Cullen.” _Shit,shit shit. I didn’t just say that, too._ Evelyn internally berated herself. Bull looked at her with a mixture of pity and amusement. “Boss, you don’t need to be Ben Hassrath trained to see that you have a thing for the Commander.” Evelyn clunked her head on the table in resignation hitting herself a little harder than she intended. “Ouch.” she yelped rubbing her forehead.

Bull threw his head back in laughter and pounded the table with his fist. Then he turned to her mischievously, “Look if you are just needing your cork popped, I can always help.” Bull’s amusement at Evelyn’s wide eyed horror and crimson face at his suggestion took the sting away from her unspoken rejection. “Just kidding, Boss. Sex among the Qunari isn’t the big deal you folks make it down here. But I get the feeling that you are looking for something beyond a phenomenal lay.”

Noting her spinning head and the downward spiral of the conversation, Evelyn thought to herself that she would surely regret this night in more ways than one tomorrow. _I really should have stopped after that second tankard. Oh well, I’ve already made a fool of myself - might as well continue._ she reasoned in the hazy logic a night filled with ale allowed. “Bull, is there something wrong with me? I mean I’ve tried flirting with Cullen. I’ve exhausted my arsenal of fluttering eyelashes, subtle innuendo, and coy smiles. Just when I think I might be getting somewhere with him, it just turns into awkward stammering and vain hopes that a rift could swallow me whole. You don’t think that he’s like Dorian - do you?”

At that suggestion, Bull erupted into another fit of laughter. Evelyn fumed as Bull struggled to regain composure. “No, Boss. He’s not like that much to Dorian’s and my own disappointment.” Evelyn’s sheltered life in the Ostwick Circle and her overly inebriated state made processing Bull’s revelation difficult. Bull watched as Evelyn pondered his statement - her eyes hazy from Chasind sack mead. Then it finally dawned on her. “Oh, you like BOTH.” 

“Nothing gets by you, Boss.” Bull teased. “Word of advice, though. You might want to lay off the booze when we go to Halamshiral.” Bull winked with his good eye and then looked at Evelyn intently. “You asked if something is wrong with you. No, I think it is more about him, Boss. Sometimes he looks like guys in Seheron before they abandon the Qun to become Tal Vashoth. He’s struggling with something, Boss. Maybe his faith, maybe the burdens of command... something. But it isn’t _you_. If anything, he seems stronger, happier when you are around.”

“I just thought of something that might be the problem.” Bull mused. “I’ve read reports that many Templars take vows of celibacy. Maybe he was one that did. I dare you to ask him.”

Filled with liquid courage, Evelyn said she’d take that dare. Stumbling with as much purpose as her besotted legs could manage Evelyn set out toward Cullen’s office before Bull could let her know he wasn’t serious about the dare. Chugging back his tankard of ale, Bull wished he could see the Commander’s face when Evelyn asked him in the middle of the night and three sheets to the wind if he was abstinent. _You can’t make this shit up._ he thought.

The icy cold night took Evelyn’s breath when she opened the tavern door that led to Skyhold’s battlements, but she would not be deterred from reaching her destination no matter how much the ground lurched beneath her feet. Some of Skyhold’s soldiers were outside of Cullen’s office and eyed her warily trying to decide if they should offer help or simply ignore her obvious intoxication. Evelyn banged on the door and let herself inside before Cullen could even answer her knock.

“Oh good, you’re still up.” Evelyn eyed the Commander who was still in full armor well past midnight. _Andraste’s flaming ass... does he ever get out of uniform?_ she thought as her eyes trailed over his body. That thought reminded her of the reason for her visit. “I had some questions ... about templars.”

Smelling alcohol and seeing her disheveled appearance, Cullen winced at the thought of where this conversation could lead. Mages and templars had been at war the past few years. The explosion that led to the Inquisition’s formation had occurred at peace talks for that war - Evelyn the sole survivor and a mage. Cullen had served as a templar in Kirkwall - one of the most notoriously dysfunctional circles even before an apostate mage blew up the city’s chantry and sparked the war. Evelyn had made her support of mages no secret - choosing to ally with them and rejecting any thought of seeking templar support for healing the breach caused by Corypheus’s twisted magic. 

While he had left the templar order to join the Inquisition, Cullen knew Evelyn was cautious around him. She was always polite - sometimes what might be considered flirtatious if such a thing were possible. But he felt certain that she didn’t trust him or like him.- _How could she?_ he thought with remorse because he adored her - her selflessness, her dry sense of humor, her easy lilting laugh. But those were thoughts best shoved aside. They were at war, she was technically his boss, and he didn’t deserve someone like her.

“Inquisitor, do you think that this is the best time for this discussion?” Cullen asked hoping that he could avoid any recriminations she might have for him. It had been a draining day, and he didn’t know if he could take his lyrium withdrawal and her rejection.

“I do, and you are going to answer me.” she said emphatically.

Cullen braced for what he assumed would be a tirade about his failings as a man. Her voice to join the chorus of loathing that nearly always filled his head. The people that died because he had let his prejudices blind him. The blood that was on his hands for not seeing through Meredith sooner. He deserved whatever she threw at him and more. But he could have never prepared for what came out of her mouth next.

“I know templars make vows to watch after mages to live a life of service, sacrifice to the Maker...blah blah blah.” Cullen grimaced at her flippant summary of his solemn vows but stood quietly as Evelyn continued. “What I want to know is if templars are expected to give up ... physical temptations?”

“Physical? Why would you ...” Cullen sputtered as his face flushed. Trying his best to regain his composure at the thought that she had come to his quarters in the dead of night to ask about vows of celibacy, Cullen launched into as dry of an explanation of the topic as he could manage. He noted the order did not require its members to be celibate. They could marry if given dispensation. However, some templars chose to take vows of abstinence as proof of their devotion. _Maker, please let this be the end of it._ he thought desperately.

Not satisfied with his response Evelyn pushed on, “Have you?” 

“Me...? I’ve umm...umm. No, I’ve taken no such vows.” Cullen felt certain that he would likely die of embarrassment if this continued much longer. “Maker’s breath... can we talk about something else?” he begged while clutching the back of his neck.

Evelyn nodded then got a strange look on her face. “I think I’m going to be sick.” she cried as she raced out his office door and vomited over the side of the battlements. Cullen trailed behind her to make sure she would be okay. 

Adding to her disgrace, Evelyn heard Bull’s familiar voice. “Uh, sorry, Cullen, I may have encouraged her to overindulge tonight. Didn’t realize she was such a lightweight. I’ll make sure she gets home okay.” Bull’s apology concluded just as the last bits of her stomach contents crystallized on Skyhold’s wall. 

Cullen nodded and returned to his office, still trying to figure out why Evelyn had wondered about his chastity. _She couldn’t be considering a romantic relationship with me - could she? That would be sheer madness and decadently wonderful. No... best to chalk it up to inebriation. Thoughts of anything more would just make things awkward._

Bull grabbed Evelyn and tossed her over his broad shoulder. “So Boss, what did you find out? Or did you get sick before you could ask him?”

“No vows for him.” she replied with a broad smile before passing out.

**Author's Note:**

> So this comes from my own reaction to Krem's revelation. I had no clue as a player that he was a transman and was lamenting that he wasn't a romance option when I took my Inquisitor for drinks with the Chargers. Krem's so cute - especially with the standing on the chair bug. He also is incredibly bright - coming up with very useful missions for the Chargers to pursue. *sigh* I thought my unrequited character crushes would end with Carter and Varric.
> 
> As far as Evelyn's inebriated interrogation of Cullen, I just can't imagine her being so forward without lots of social lubricant.


End file.
